Hey y’all! I’m fixinto get real southern on ya! Here in the south there is never a lack of creativity when it comes to our use of words. Where sass and charm are a way of life and slow talkin’ is an art, the southern accent makes it irresistable. We have a sayin’ for just about every occasion and we know the value of catchin’ more flies with honey than vinegar. If you wanna work on your southern drawl just silence the last “g” of most words and you’ll fit right in!
There’s no such thing as strangers in the south, just friends you haven’t met yet. Greetin’ someone is almost always accompanied by a warm hug and some charmin’ phrase immediately making you feel welcome! You’ll hear things like: “how’s your mom’n’em?”, “gimme some sugah”, and “well, aren’t you cute as a button?!”
A southern girl is sweet as cherry pie and she can charm dew off the honey suckle. Believe me when I say, she’ll use it to get jus’ about anything she wants. As sure as water flows down hill she’ll make you happier than a dead pig in the sunshine!
When she says “oh honey”, “sweetheart”, or “darlin” it’s either the most loving term of endearment or a dire warning. Dare to cross her and she’ll insult you without you even knowin’ it. Her level of sarcasm shouldn’t be downplayed by her sweet southern drawl. “Aren’t you precious” and “bless your heart” are not what you want to hear come out of her mouth. If she’s real mad she’ll say; “you’re as slow as molasses going up hill in winter.” or “you’re dumber than a box of rocks.”
When it comes to southern mamas no one holds a candle to the respect she demands. You’ll have another thing comin’ if you’re ever feeling too big for your britches and decide not to say “yes, ma’am and no, ma’am” when talkin’ to your mama….or any woman for that matter! Oh, goodness gracious, if you get above your raisin’ and back talk she’ll cut eyes so deep she won’t even need to say words. You’ll make her madder than a wet hen and if you think she’s gonna put up with that you got another thing comin’! When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!!!
There’s a difference between a “hissy fit” and a “conniption” and we don’t “have” them, we “pitch” em. She’ll tell ya to “hush your mouth and quit being ugly.” or she’ll “put a knot in your tail.”
Time is different here in the south. Saying goodbye always takes at least half an hour. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been there, it could be hours or days, she’ll always say “No need to run off. You just got here!” She’ll require no less than 3 hugs and somehow you will always end up taking home some kind of homemade leftovers. “You’re not gonna go home hungry.”
Bless your soul if you have to go back in because you forgot something….it all starts over. “Tell your mom’n’em hi for me”….more hugs…..”don’t be a stranger, come back any time hun!” “Call me when you’re home safe.” She’ll follow you out the door making sure you are completely out of sight before she’s done yellin’ bye 30 times from her front porch. “Don’t forget to call! love ya, bye hun!”
That’s just how its done in the south and it ain’t ever gonna change. Life just sounds so much better with a southern drawl and a little southern hospitality goes a long way! Chances are you’ll get more than just a lil’! I love all y’all! Come on back now ya hear! 😉